Ohhhh this one is hysterical to me.
Because it's going to be about how Ss Ex wife told us that we need to respect K, and her....and her newest boyfriend.
Let me start from the beginning.
A few weeks ago, S was unable to Skype with K....for almost a week, because his ex MIL was going to be visiting the Ex wife....apparently the ex MIL can't deal with K being on Skype for a few minutes?
Then we got these texts:
"Also, we are taking a trip to Indiana and then up to Massachusetts this summer. We will be in Boston for a few days. We are planning on going to the aquarium on Saturday July 6th and wanted to invite you to join us for the day so you can see K____. I don't need an answer now, but if you could let me know by June 30th so we can plans times and such, I would appreciate it.
S responded that WE ALL would be going.
"That's acceptable so long as you both display appropriate behavior in front of K____. If you do not, we will not hesitate to call security. You also should not push the brother/sister type relationship. K____ has been very clear recently that she does not have siblings. It is rare for her to mention that she has half-siblings anymore. They are your children and we respect that. But I don't want her to get attached as she doesn't see them often. As long as you can respect the boundaries, K____, myself and my boyfriend we shouldn't have any problems."
As we were laughing about her "calling security" on us, we asked her what exactly she meant by appropriate behavior? And how exactly we were supposed to keep all the kiddos from playing and interacting and not mentioning that they're all related?
"I'm not saying we keep them from playing. I'm saying that you introduce them as D_____ and V__. Not "your brother/sister" or "your half-brother/sister." ...... "And appropriate behavior means appropriate dress, language and attitude. You don't get to sit there and be rude to me or P__, make subtle comments or threats, or get snarky when I override something."
"I am telling you now that if you are not appropriately dressed and using language appropriate for the ears of children, we will leave."
Does this woman have every right to look out for her kid? Yeah sure. But I have A LOT of problems with this whole scenario!
You're going out of town and all over the place with your brand new boyfriend? With your 7 year old kid who you claim has problems meeting new people?
Didn't you just say to us (I didn't write it here) that K was basically being introduced to S and I all over again since she hasn't seen us in so long? Did you ask all of the other people that you're about to meet for the first time to "dress appropriately"? When you had your new boyfriend move in to your grandmothers house, did he have to change everything about himself?
Now, I KNOW that when she says "dress appropriately" she means ME (how could S dress inappropriately?) ....and I would reallllly like to know WHEN I have ever dressed in short dresses or low cut shirts in front of K...seriously!
You want us to respect all of you? Here's the thing: S has never been rude to any of the Exes numerous boyfriends! Well, never to their faces! He laughs at how stupid they all are actually, because he knows what his Ex is like. In fact, the Exes third Fiance actually asked for Ss permission to marry the Ex!! S recommended against it (for his friends sake), but said he could do whatever he wanted to do.....needless to say, those two broke up a couple of weeks before they were supposed to be married, and the Ex got back together with the other Fiance that she had broken up with a few weeks after he left for deployment.
The way we see it....hell, we won't give this guy a hard time, but we will laugh at him...because he has no idea what he got himself into.
Will we respect K? Of course! She hasn't done anything wrong!
Respect the Ex? That's a whole other story...but we won't make any mention of it at the time, because K doesn't deserve to see that scenario.
Now about the kiddos. Yes, we will introduce Dude and Princess as Ks half siblings, because that's what they are, and K has the right to actually finally meet, and know her siblings. We are not going to lie, or hide the truth. But what am I going to say to Dude when he's confused as to why K doesn't want anything to do with him? Tell him that K and her mother don't like him for no fault of his own? This is a troubling idea for me. I'm worried, because Dude gets attached to everyone! He loves people, loves talking to people, loves playing with other kids. The last thing I need is for Dude to be hurt and not understand that it's because some hateful woman he doesn't even know, has been feeding his half-sister with lies. Am I concerned about Princess? Nope, because I know she'll be holding mine and Ss hands the whole time.
Basically, what it comes down to, is how can the Ex possibly throw out words like "respect" when she has none for us as a family. She is telling us how to dress, how to act, and how to talk of all things!
She can't change us as a family for a girl that we haven't seen in three years, and might not see for another three!! We will act as we always do. And that includes respecting K (which we have always done) and respecting the Exes current boyfriend.
How can the Ex throw out words like "respect" when she is traveling all over the place with a guy that she's only known for a little over a month? Really? Try having some freaking respect for yourself. Stop talking about how you are careful with K, and you don't introduce her to your boyfriends, because it's obviously a lie.
Should be a great trip! I'm actually really excited to go with S and the kiddos! I went to the Boston Aquarium in Junior High and loved it and I know they will love it too!
The part about the Ex being there though....that doesn't excite me too much.